Category: lyme disease

art, best effort, brushes, digital art, inks, lyme disease, oils, Rebelle, watercolor

Driving Home Ain’t What It Used To Be

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Driving Home Ain't What It Used To Be

Driving Home Ain’t What It Used To Be

This is another painting using impasto brushes.

As usual, I started this painting in Rebelle, using watercolors and inks to make lots of drips and other interesting shapes and lines.

Then, I took it into Painter and added the impasto brushes.

I’m thinking of changing my blog.  I started this blog because I was very ill with what was diagnosed at Fibromyalgia and Lyme disease.  Well, it turns out I just had Lyme disease.  I’m feeling better after four long years of treatment for the Lyme.

I am out and about walking and doing other things I haven’t been able to do in almost 20 years.  I want my blog to be a celebration of the new me.  I’m going to keep the name of my blog, but change the description.

It turns out that I also have atypical migraines.  I have had a bad bout with that.  But, hooray, there’s a medication for that.  I’m on it, and that is resolving.  I’ve had that since 1983.  So, things are really looking up in my life.  I hope your life is going well.

 

art, best effort, digital art, God, lyme disease, Maui, oils, Painter, paintings

Flower Frenzy

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Flower Frenzy

Flower Frenzy

I started this painting like I start all my paintings.  I make a few layers of marks with several colors.  Then I start looking to find what appears to me in the painting.

Lately, all I’ve seen are flowers.  Flowers everywhere.

I think this is because I’m getting closer to going to Maui for two months.  Maui is filled with gorgeous colors and beautiful flowers.

When I first became ill, my life as I knew it ended.  I laid in bed for over 15 years with no diagnosis.  I did nothing except go to doctors when able.

When I finally got a diagnosis of lyme disease, I got treatment and some of my life returned.  Not a lot, but more than I had.

I believe that my constant faith in God (although there were some challenging times about that) and my ability to pick myself up and be positive and practice staying positive got me back to living.

My life is still very limited, but I’m extremely grateful I live only a five-hour flight from Maui.  I can do sitting on an airplane.  I collapse once I get there.  But, I’ll have plenty of time to recover from the flight this year.

Aloha, everyone!

 

acrylics, art, best effort, brushes, digital art, God, inks, lyme disease, oils, pain, Painter, paintings, positive, positive energy, Rebelle, show up

Mystery

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Mystern

Mystery

My husband retired last July, and I got behind in blogging because I used to do my blogging and reading of blogs during lunch.  Now, I eat lunch with him. I’m trying to get caught up on reading other’s blogs and writing my own.

Overall, I’m glad that Warren is retired and is spending more time with me.  We have been together since 1970.  We moved in together that year.  When we were younger, and sometimes not employed, we always had a blast together.  I had pictured the same thing would be true now that we are no longer employed and have all day free to play.

The only thing I did not consider is that I am sick, and can’t go out and play anytime I want to.  Despite that, I am still enjoying having Warren in my life all day, every day.

This winter was very hard for me.  I had a flare of some kind, and was sick from New Years Eve until recently.  I am feeling on the upswing now.  But, it was a real scare.  I went back to spending days where I could do nothing but lay in bed, under the covers and be very sick.  I had a lot of pain breakthroughs that were very severe.  On those days, old tapes would start to play in my head.  I would start to think that I was going to spend all day, every day back in bed and be able to do nothing.

That is when positive thinking came back to save me.  I got myself calmed down and thought through the process logically.  I would admit that yes, I’m sick today.  But the recent pattern has been that I will be sick one day and then better the next.  Usually within two days, I’m up, dressed and going out to lunch with Warren.  I affirmed these things.  I prayed for help and guidance.  I practiced positive thinking.  I forced myself to think in a positive way.

As usual, it worked.  The pain eventually subsided and is under control again with morphine.  I have more energy and am feeling better just in time for summer.

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acrylics, art, best effort, brushes, digital art, lyme disease, Maui, oils, Painter, paintings, Rebelle, show up, watercolor

A Bird In Your Pocket

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A Bird in Your Pocket

A Bird in Your Pocket

I have had a very challenging year, health-wise.  The fibromyalgia flared up around New Years Eve, and has kept me lying low many days.

Last fall, while we were in Maui, I started sitting up all day.  This was the first time in over 18 years that I didn’t spend 99% of my days in bed.  I also got dressed every day.  This may not sound like a lot, but when you’ve lived in a nightie in bed for so long, it is huge.

When we got home in November, I continued sitting up in my art studio.  I was doing so well that at Christmas, I got a new, 27″ screen for my computer!  It makes a huge difference to paint on that rather than my laptop computer.  But then, the first of the year, I found myself back in bed more than in my studio.  It has been a real battle to get enough rest and still sit up as much as possible.

But, I feel like I’ve won the battle.  In the last few weeks, I’ve been able to go to my studio at least three to four days a week.  I’m even taking small walks down to our mailbox.

Now a Bird In Your Pocket.

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art, best effort, digital art, God, lyme disease, oils, pain, Painter, paintings, pencils

Oh No You Don’t

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Oh No You Don't

Oh No You Don’t

This painting is one I did a couple of months ago.  Somehow it didn’t get posted yet.

It is done with oil brushes and liquid inks and some pencils were added.  I did this piece in Painter 2015.

It was a very hard piece to bring to a conclusion.  I really liked parts of it, but there were areas, as it developed, that drove me nuts.  When I did this, I was focusing, as usual on lights and darks.  Values and good contrast are big parts of a good painting.

In Painter, it is possible to add a layer to the piece I’m working on, then I fill the layer with black and choose the composite method colorize.  When that layer is open, it turns the painting into grey scale.  It is then easy to see whether the painting has enough values going on.

I ended up turning this picture on its side several times before deciding that it would go this way.  That is something I learned in my first painting class from Flora Bowley.

It really comes in handy when working on an abstract.

I have had a very hard time this year with my health.  I have had a lot of break-through pain.  Something that hasn’t happened in over a year.  That, along with GOK (God Only Knows) has caused me to have to spend more time in bed and paint less this year.  I get very despondent on days when I feel sick.  It feels like I’ve stepped backwards and will never go forward again.

I think this is all part of the healing process from lyme disease.  A good friend and I have discussed this years’ setbacks.  I’ve concluded, with her help, that just maybe the bad days seem a lot worse because the good days are so much better.  I certainly hope so.

I try to continue to stay positive no matter what my health is doing.  I am just very grateful to be able to do art again.

 

art, art shows, awards, best effort, digital art, God, honesty, lyme disease, pain, Painter, paintings, pencils, positive, positive energy, show up

Staying Positive Works — Strong Spirit

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Strong Spirit

Strong Spirit

This painting was done in Painter, using oils, liquid inks and pencils.  I am using it because it is entitled Strong Spirit.  That is what I have.

I started this blog to write about fibromyalgia and lyme disease.  My intention was to write how my belief in a God of my understanding, coupled with affirmations, gratitude and positive thought had allowed me to find a peaceful, fulfilling life in spite of these chronic illnesses.

Then, practicing those things led me back to being able to do art, and art has pretty much been the focus of this blog.

Today, I want to write about positive thinking.

I came across the idea of having God in my life and thinking positive about 30 years ago.  I began reading a lot of varied books on many religions.  I put together an idea of what God is for me, personally.  I believe there is something that holds us all together.  I believe that we are all connected in some way.  I believe that when I, or someone else, does something negative or harmful, it affects us all.

I believe in taking personal responsibility for myself and what I can change.  As I read and researched, I concluded that the only thing in this world that is possible for me to change is me.  I can’t change you.  I can, however, change how I react to you.

This was working fine, and life was going along real sweet.  I was a textile/mixed media artist.  My work was starting to sell.  I was having shows in galleries.  I had been in a group show at a very prestigious museum here in Seattle.  I won awards for my art.  Life looked good.  Positive thinking and a belief in a God of my understanding was working.

Oops, I got sick.  I didn’t just get sick, I got completely disabled and unable to do anything but lay in bed and wonder when I was going to die.  Doctors said I was crazy.  No one, absolutely no one would help me.

Friends and family walked away.  As they left, they said “Screw, you.  You’re a little liar, you’re not sick, just crazy.”

OK.  I got mad.  I got angry, I got resentful, hateful, mean-spirited, the whole thing.  I threatened to divorce my husband of over 30 years.  I was one sick, miserable person.

Where had it all gone?  What was happening?  One day I woke up, and could stand myself no longer.  I vaguely recalled what I had practiced just before I became sick.  I was very dubious.  I figured, this stuff works when things go well, God is there when I’m happy.  But what happens when the pedal hits the metal?  It’s all gone.

Hmm.  Perhaps I had missed something.  “OK”, I said, find something to be positive about.  What?  I can’t remember what I found, but I found one small thing.  Like breathing or something.  I practiced being grateful.  I said affirmations.  I worked at it.  I was not convinced, but I went on with the teeny, tiny bit of faith I had left.

It worked.  Just as negative things build and grow larger and become overwhelming, so do positive things.  It built up.  I found more things to be positive about.

Don’t get me wrong, it was slow going.

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art, best effort, brushes, digital art, digital art academy, lyme disease, Painter, paintings, time out

Look In My Eyes

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Look In My Eyes

Look In My Eyes

I have taken a brush making class at the Digital Art Academy (DAA). The DAA is an on-line school that teaches art while using Painter, the app I use to make my art.  Jason Maranto taught the class.  It has been fantastic.

First, let me explain about brushes in Painter.  You don’t just grab your mouse and paint.  I use a stylus and tablet that plugs into my computer.

Painter comes with over 700 brushes.  These brushes are in many media, such as oils, acrylics, pastels, charcoal, pens, pencils, watercolors, conte, markers, crayons, inks and others.  The brushes actually mimic real world media.  The brushes work with paper textures.  So one can take charcoal or pastels and draw on a rough surface or smooth surface.  The brushes will show the textures of the rough papers and be smooth in the others.

The brushes in Painter have a number of adjustments.  Painter calls these adjustments the Brush Engine.  It is much like an engine, very complicated.  For each brush, there are setting about how the brush will interact with paper, opacity of the paint, the saturation of the paint, the paper grain, the angle the brush is held, and many more settings for each brush.  Users of Painter can make brushes in addition to making adjustments to the brushes that come with the program.

In my art, I want as much as possible to have every part of it my touches, my strokes, my decisions.  In order to do that with digital art, I needed to understand the brush engine. 

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